How Will You Be Remembered?

Pete Michael, one of our hospice chaplains, responded to my open invitation to the hospice staff to contribute inspirational stories about our patients. So here is Pete’s contribution.

“Buck” is a 60 year old Hospice patient with lung cancer. He is a “jack of all trades”, a self taught musician and nature photographer. His family will tell you that he can fix anything that needs fixed and that he has been that way since he took apart, and put back together, his Christmas presents as a 5 year old. He has also played music and taken pictures for almost as many years.

The conversation inspiring this story started when Buck responded to my question, “Who was your model of spirituality as you grew up?” Buck’s answer was quick and sure, “It was, and is, my Mom. She was the one who lived her faith in front of us every day.” When Buck talks about his mom his eyes light up and he becomes energized. His sister and primary caregiver, Marti, has the same reaction.

Several key thoughts emerged about Buck’s mother, Doris, during our conversation. Buck reflected, “She was no bigger than a minute in size; but there was no one larger in heart…If you came to our house, no matter who you were, you got hugged and something to eat. It was not optional. Her faith allowed her to love in a deep and unconditional way that started with her expression of hospitality.”

The second thought that emerged was Doris’ ability to see the good in everybody and yet not be used. She was evidently, “…as wise as a serpent and harmless as a dove” (Matthew: 10:16). Buck put it this way, “You called her naive but God called her love…She could look right through the wool you were trying to pull over her eyes”.

But Buck’s mother’s greatest teaching came in the way that she helped her children come to terms with their behavior. Buck recollected, “She would just look you right in the eye and ask, ‘If Jesus were standing right beside you when you are doing that, would you still do it?’. Buck added, “As I grew up that was sometimes a comfort to me; but often a thought that convicted me of the things I was doing.” Doris died a few years ago but Buck declares, “Her legacy lives on in our family and our lives…She was, and is, my model.”

The Apostle Paul expressed his appreciation to fellow Christians in the city of Thessalonica, for the way they modeled the Christian faith: “We always thank God for all of you, mentioning you in our prayers. We continually remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ (1 Thessalonians 1:2)

The obvious question before you is “Who is your model for spirituality? On a deeper level, what is it about your spiritual models that has influenced or inspired you? What “works produced by faith”, what “labors prompted by love”, what hopes and dreams have been inspired by them? How have their lives and examples drawn you closer to our Lord Jesus Christ? Now for your assignment, “How about stopping for a few minutes and writing at least three of your responses down?

Finally, for the more challenging questions, “For whom do you serve as a model?” “How can you pass on what you’ve learned to them?” “What spiritual legacy do you hope will live on in your family’s hearts and lives?” And, “How do you want to be remembered?” I think you’ll agree, these aren’t rhetorical questions; but matters of eternal significance.